Guzarish – Movie Review

Starring: Hrithik’s hair and Aishwarya’s cleavage
Director: His Intelligency Mr. Sanjay Leela Bhansali
Sufferer: Me

There are some things that one has come to associate a Bhansali film. The dialogues would be a lot in English, the sets would be opulent, the visuals stunning, and the story – boring.

Guzarish comes (joins thumb and index finger and makes a face) this close to breaking the mould, but alas, fails to.

Guzaarish is the story of Ethan Masceranhas, a one time magician (though all we see him doing is an extremely gay dance, and another trick in which he rises in the air holding a candle) who is now quadriplegic. Aishwarya plays his nurse who has been taking care of him for 12 years now. Ethan has been a survivor, for he has written a book inspiring quadriplegics to fight on. He is also an RJ who dishes out gyan to people in a tackily named radio station called ‘Radio Zindagi’. One day, he decides that he wants to end his life. Ethanasia – as he puts it.

Now, here is where logic is raped. If you want to take a crucial and personal decision like this, who would you consult? Your doctor, lawyer, mother? Na. Magic-boy asks his listeners to ‘vote’ for or against his decision. His lawyer grudgingly agrees to fight his case, but the judge and public prosecutor (terribly cliched roles)turn down his wish. Finally, he manages to find a solution.

Now that we are done with the storyline, I have some questions to ask. Why do the characters in Bhansali’s films always talk in English? And why is there a sense of loss of time and space in his movies? And why are they always about disabled people? And why does Aishwarya dress up as if she is going to attend the Boston Tea Party?

I think it is this pseudo sense of intellectualism that Bhansali wants to portray. Tell you what, we audiences are smarter than that. We don’t mind watching a film that is dumb, but acknowledges it. And yes, if we wanted to watch art movies, Torrent zindabad!

Performance wise, Hrithik is in good form. He is the only reason you can tolerate the movie, but in the end scenes, even he seems to have grown tired of this madness. His accent sounds fake and his long drawn speech seems like it was forced down his throat. Aishwarya has nothing much to do, except apply extremely red lipstick and flaunt her cleavage (which is a lot, actually. I am sure this is the most cleavage an actor has shown in recent times). The music is lackluster and seems to be lifted from Saawariya and HDDCS.

Guzarish, sadly, is another serving of pseudo intellectual bullshit dished out by Bhansali. Carry a pack of Eno with you!

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